Hell-Mart Post for Not Hannah

I was reading This post over at I'm Not Hannah and remembered my own recent suckish trip to the dreaded Hell-mart. I thought I'd share it just so my buddy over there knows that she is SO NOT ALONE in hating that place. I LOATHE it, and as mentioned in her post, the people that work there are about as equally like able as the whole Wal-mart corporation.

About a week ago, I had to take back this toy that we had bought the B for christmas. Lemme just pause to say that I was really proud of myself for actually following through with the "I'm going to buy a present here and there instead of doing it all at the last minute" thing this year, too. Anyhow, I had bought her one of those little leap frog hand held game systems which was supposed to come with three games, as advertised on the box. Well after very carefully opening everything and such, I could not find said games. SO, we brought it back to the store.

I hate dealing with the customer service reps because they are just snotty horrible, rude people and they always put my back up. SO, while Tim is dealing with bringing the toy back I went ahead and gathered a few things that I needed: diapers, coffee, some veggies for dinner, that kind of thing. As I'm finishing up, Tim walks up to the cart still holding the box and looking flustered.

He explains that they will not take the toy back because:

A) It doesn't have the three games that are advertised on the box (so obviously we must have stolen them, but now we want to bring the system back. That's right. We don't want to PLAY the games, we just want to look at them. MORONS).

B) The customer service lady says that THIS wal-mart doesn't even carry those games so we have to take it back to the store we bought it from.

C) No receipt.

Apparently while she was explaining this to my hubby she was talking VERY slowly like he must be some kind of idiot. There was plenty of eye rolling and "I'm just doing my job sir's" while she grinned knowingly at him for being a supposed thief. And not just any thief mind you, a dumb one who was stealing games but returning the system on which you play them. And apparently she just knew they didn't carry them because the electronics person she called to the front wasn't familiar with them.

OH HELLS NO

SO, I walk over to the TOY section where the EXACT SAME SYSTEMS are sitting happily on the shelf and pick one up, making sure that it is

A) EXACTLY THE SAME AS MINE, advertising the 3 games and all

B) COMPLETELY UNOPENED, with eve the tape in tact.

I then wheel my happy ass back up to the customer service counter and wait my turn while glaring mind bullets at the customer service woman who is grinning all knowingly like she is getting ready to show me something.

When it is my turn I set my system and the one from their shelves onto the counter and tell her that I would like her to open the box FROM THEIR SHELVES WHICH THEY DO HAVE BECAUSE IT'S IN THEIR TOY SECTION NOT ELECTRONICS (MORON!!!!!) and show me the games it is SUPPOSED to have.

She says, "Oh! Okay!" all sing song and happy like, still as though she's about to show me something.

I swear she spent a good 15 minutes tearing that box apart. She pulled the cardboard apart, looked in every nook and cranny, I thought she was about to start shredding the cardboard to find those stupid games. All the while she is getting more and more flustered looking for those damned games. And she couldn't say I took them because that damn box was TAPED SHUT and I had a line of about 5 witnesses behind me as well as an assistant manager watching her search that box for those games.

When she can't find them, I explain to her that as MY BOX is EXACTLY the same as the one I just pulled off of THEIR shelves, and they are BOTH missing the games that I would like my money back. She gives me the same stupid grin she gave my hubby and says, "Well it was the customer service manager's decision because this is supposed to be loaded, so would you like to take it up with her. " I reply, that YES I WOULD, I would be friggin ECSTATIC to talk to a manager! which is apparently NOT what she wanted to hear. I guess she thought I was just going to take her word that the manager already said no and not cause her to call them over and explain how she was WRONG. Unfortunately for her, I would be more than willing to explain to the manager how she was ALSO WRONG and that someone was going to give me something back for this toy that I bought from their store that was defective.

She quickly says that all she can do as we have no receipt is to put the money on a gift card. That's fine, I say, I just want something back for this toy, which is EXACTLY THE SAME AS THE ONE ON THEIR SHELVES!!! She gives me this "tut tut" look and says that she thinks I have made my point. I respond, that I'm glad she now understands that my husband and I are not dishonest people and neither are we stupid enough to steal games and then return the system that is used to play them. I tell her that I'm also glad that I've made it quite clear that she was WRONG about their store not carrying the toy, much less the fact that she didn't know which part of the store that it was in. She gives me this stupid plastic grin that at this point I'm about ready to "bad-biscuit" slap off of her face and then explains that she will have to get a manager's key in order to put the money on the gift card. At this point the assistant manager behind the counter practically shoves the woman out of the way in a huff while explaining that she HAS a key. (So apparently I"m not the only one who thinks that woman is an idiot)

We got the money on the card which I used to pay for the things in my cart and I swear, if the people behind me in line hadn't been holding things they would have applauded. I don't often show my ass, having worked in retail and in groceries stores and in customer service myself, but this warranted an exception. I understand that she had a job to do, but if she doesn't know her job or her store she shouldn't be behind that counter. Also the way she TREATED my hubs and myself, like we were stupid, dishonest people was just down right RUDE. So I will admit. I SHOWED MY ASS. I was RUDE AS HADES to that woman and I was as belittling to her as I could manage to be, WITHOUT swearing. I hate resorting to swearing in those types of situations because I feel it makes me appear unintelligent and hick-ish. I made sure to use plenty of big words like "Incompetent" while telling her exactly what I thought of her "customer service" and to make sure that my expression was just as snotty and superior looking as her own. Meanwhile, my hubby is standing behind me trying so hard not to laugh that he was choking.

I hate Hell-Mart too, not Hannah! I HATE IT! LOL I will do everything I can NOT to have to shop there.